This liquor store changed my life

When have you ever heard someone credit a liquor store for changing their life? If any, it was probably in a negative way. This liquor store changed my life in a positive way. Let me explain.

When I was 16 I hung around misfits. Most of my teenage years was spent on a figurative island hanging with literal misfits. We got into all kinds of shit. Girls, drugs, crime. Whatever we could that seemed like fun. "Fun". Yeah right. Most of the stuff I got into for a few years could've cost me jail time or worse.

Don't get me wrong, I don't have a record. I've never hurt anyone intentionally. I have no kids or STDs. Even when I did stupid shit I still did it smartly. " Smartly".

OK so let me tell you about this liquor store situation. When I was 15 or 16 I had one of the only cars in my friends circle so I got called most of all. Everyone wanted rides, right? Well this one night I got a call from 2 friends (we'll call them Tom & Jerry) saying they had an idea. They said they wanted to rob the liquor store. It didn't seem like the worst idea but I was still reluctant. I told them no. Do you want to know how they convinced me? That they would bring a duffle bag and give me as much alcohol as could fit in it. That simple. No money, just the alcohol.

I was game. My car wasn't the coolest or fastest thing around, but it was reliable. I went and picked them up around 8 or 9 that night and we're psyching ourselves up and trying to get into the mood. They're putting their ski masks on and Tom shows me he has a gun. Well, you can't rob anything without a gun I suppose. I wasn't thinking much about it. We finally arrive.

At this liquor store there is a road behind it that goes upward at an angle and curves to the left about 600 ft up it and goes toward town. We're right on the edge of town. I park on this road, right behind the store. They tell me to keep the car running. Duh. I got this. So they run down the slight hill and to the front of the store. What was probably only a minute or 2 felt like an hour. All of a sudden I heard a gun shot.

Then I heard another. That's all I heard when I took off. I'm not proud of that moment but I wasn't expecting them to use the gun. Being the get away driver is one thing, being an accomplice to murder is totally different. Sure enough I took off and around that turn and back toward town. It takes about 10 minutes to lap around town to get back to the store even though I really have no idea why I went back other than to go pick them up. Cops should've been there by the time I got there, so I don't know why I was heading back. Maybe I wanted to redeem myself?

Either way, I went back. I went back up the hill where I parked and saw nobody. No cops. No friends. No concerned citizens. Did I hear wrong? What was that noise? What just happened? I drive around the left turn and out pops Jerry. He jumps in and he's not even mad at me. He just asked why as I'm trying to get out of there ASAP as he's frantic also (obviously). He explains to me that they couldn't get inside because they were closed and there were bars on the door. So what do they decide to do? Shoot inside. Just to break shit. Just to be stupid. If you can't catch a felony one way, might as well try another.

Well we drive around for a few trying to find Tom. No luck. After some time passes me park and walk. Finally we find him. Apparently his aunt lived in the area and he went there,  but she wasn't home so he just hid around back. We walk back to my car and I take them to Tom's house and I go home. Over the next few days I reevaluate my friendship with these guys. Now I don't want to completely drop them but I have to do something. I tell them never again. I decided I'm not going to be doing anything like that again. They agreed and everything was cool.

I straightened up quite a bit after that. I did hang around them still and we still did dumb shit but I never did anything quite like that. The next time I talk about these guys I'll tell you how I ended up basically dislocating my jaw and ending up in the hospital because they overdosed me on the wrong pills.

Yeah, I've lived a very interesting life.

This is where I'm from...

These next few pictures are where I've either lived or where I'm from. I moved away from West Virginia when I was 10 (fortunately, you'll see why) and this is why I consider myself successful. You have to understand where I'm from in order to see why. 

These types of houses and buildings are littered through out the state. These aren't the worst, just what I grabbed on the way into town. There are towns much worse off, people much worse off. I'm glad my mom moved me away from the state as a kid or I would've ended up like most of the other kids my age and hooked on drugs, living in poverty, and working whatever job is available (there aren't many). 

Pinnacle Rock

I only lived here for a year

Same as above

The viewing area of Pinnacle Rock

These next few pictures are the types of houses that line the majority of the way to my hometown.

Most of these should absolutely be condemned

Some may be, but some are still in use

This is what he does

No phone service. You have to drive almost an hour away to get it.

Our little hospital.

I Made It To West Virginia

I've been pretty bummed out the last few days. The guy who I was supposed to go up north with for a few weeks had to bail because he broke his nose Saturday (he does MMA fighting) and has to get it drained every few days. Cheers to you Greg, I hope you feel better.

My friends in Raleigh we're extremely hospitable and were nothing short of amazing while I was visiting. Even one of our mutual friends was in town we all got to hangout like we used to. It was very relaxing. I'm back in Winston until this weekend as I've been trying to figure out where to go. All my plans were contingent on me going up north for a few weeks, now everything is in disarray. I'm not stressing it, just trying to figure out what's next. I'm contemplating going to visit my family for a few days before I head back out, but then that means driving upwards of 3 hours north and then having to drive those same 3 hours back down south just to even start, and the locations I'm thinking are Savannah, GA (5 hours), St. Augustine, FL (8 hours), and New Orleans, LA (12 hours) so adding those 3 hours could really make a difference in how long of a day I have.

Why those places? The history and the culture. Simple as that. I bet they're beautiful places and I've only seen pictures and it's less than a day away, so why not go? After that I'd like to come back to NC for a few days to rest, and then go to Lexington, KY, Detroit, and Chicago. That would pretty much clear out most of the locations on the east coast that I've always wanted to visit but haven't yet, besides Boston and Maine :(

Then I'd have to come back to NC because I have to shoot a wedding in Lexington, NC on Sept. 13 and then I'm free to hit the road until Oct. 10 when I have a wedding in Greensboro, NC. MY birthday is Oct. 25 so I'm not sure what I plan on doing. It really all depends on my financial situation if I'm able to keep out on the road. It's only barely August and I'm thinking 2 months into the future. I need to relax, that is not what the trip is about!

I just made it to West Virginia, and the traffic was annoyingly bad. There was exactly 0 accidents but roughly 37 moments of stop and go traffic in extremely light rain up a not-so-steep incline. At one point my GPS (the almighty Waze) rerouted me after so much traffic and took me out of a lot of it only to run into some about half an hour later. Annoying, but not going to ruin my trip. I have my music on, my dog sitting in the backseat while resting his head on my arm rest falling asleep, and I have nothing to do until Sept. 13. Where am I rushing to?

My mom moved here late last year to be around my brother and his kids (he's working on his 6th, he has a brood) and help raise them. I haven't seen her or my brother since Christmas and I've never been close to his kids. If I had any regrets, it would be that. I'm good with kids and I like the I just don't want any of my own. Not now, anyway. So I got to spend some time with them tonight and it was so much fun. I got to chase them, wrestle them, pick on them, and most importantly I got to laugh with them. My nephew really brought it to my attention that I'm absentee when he blurted out that we had never met before. Was he right? I mean, I've see him less than the fingers I have on one hand. That's pretty shit. In my defense, they live in a whole other state. Alas it's my fault. I can be better.

Tomorrow I go to see my dad for a few days and then I come back to my moms for a night or two and then I figure out what's going on from there. It really depends on the weather. I can't go to these towns that are hours and hours away when its raining. How will I meet people? How do I get to see and photograph the towns/cities? How do I photograph the PEOPLE. So I have to wait out this stupid weather. If you could see me I'm shaking my fist angrily at the sky as if that means anything.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you like the pictures I have and (in the future) will be including :)

Me with one of my (many) nieces

Raleigh

A favorite of mine: a cute couple cuddling outside

I made it to Raleigh

Do you believe in Universal signs? If you do then you wouldn't be attempting this trip. Last week my camera broke, this week my check engine light cut on and on the way to Raleigh it was the worst rain storm I've driven through in quite a few years. All the signs that say 'Dont do it. Turn back. Go back to what you know.' Even a friend told me I should wait and fix my car or save up more first, but if I wait then when will it ever be the right time? I'll just keep waiting, and waiting, and planning, but never actually DOING. This is me DOING.

Last night we (Amanda, Ruben, Jamie, AJ) went out downtown Raleigh and I had my camera with me. I met some very interesting people out and about. One guy (I believe his name is Grey) is close to 40, recently single, no kids, head of a multimedia company, and is unhappy. I talked to him for close to half an hour, and brought him to another bar with us and introduced him to my friends. Come to find out, he's not from here and has lived in almost a dozen cities for work, and with his recent break up and him only being here for 9 months - he's completely alone. How does a grown person make friends in a town theyre new to? By putting themselves out there. He said it, and he knew what he had to do.

Ultimately him being happy is inside of him and he has to figure it out. He could possibly lose his job, or get a promotion, on Monday and he didn't (seem to) care either way. I asked him what his passion is, what talent he's had as a kid that he would like to continue doing, just digging deep and figuring him out. I got him to tell me he loves playing the drums, so I tried to convince him to start a band. It's not about being a successful band, although every one wants to be successful in everything they do, but it's a great outlet to release that built up frustration of the mundane.

Today is my last day in Raleigh and I'm a mixed bag of emotions about it. On one hand, I'm excited to venture into new territory and go to places I haven't been to and meet new people, but on the other hand I'm content being with my friends and the calm familiarity of people I know. The time I've spent here has been fun but it's time to head on up north. I'll be spending my last hours with them and then packing up and heading on a 12 hr drive up to Boston.

The Past Few Days...

A few days ago I officially started moving things into storage. My buddy is letting me store my things in his place while I'm on the road so I came today to bring a load of things. I've come to realize I'm a minimalist. If it wasn't for my bed I could load everything I own in my car. How crazy is that? I'm 28 and the only things I care about are my dog, my camera equipment, and my computer. Throw in some clothes and I'm good to go. I'm simple, I don't need all those extra things like a new car, new clothes all the time, collecting things I don't use. Well one more trip and I'll be officially moved and hitting the road. 

My camera also has started to slowly give out. My shutter is messing up, and 2 or 3 pictures out of every 10 or so turn out messed up due to the shutter moving too slow and being caught in the process of taking the picture leaving a black mark normally at the bottom of the photo. Great, just what I need. A money issue already, and I absolutely need my camera. It's the tool I use to pay bills, to feed myself and my dog, and it's what I use for my own entertainment. So, there's an expense I wasn't expecting and certainly affects my financial situation but it's something I have to do. I need it, so I might as well pull the trigger. BOOM!

Cue Troy Tomlinson from Flaming Chicken Studio in Charlotte, NC. He told me he had a replacement camera for me for a good price and it worked out because I had to be in Charlotte a few days later for a photo shoot (and I was going to need a camera for it). So I went by his studio and picked up the camera and headed to my photo shoot which was just over the border in South Carolina. I went through the entire shoot just fine and was bragging on the camera (how good of shape it was) when all of a sudden...something broke inside. I did nothing, but something definitely broke inside. But what was it?

I took the lens off and inspected, and it was the mirror. The mirror just completely came loose in it, and fell out. Now I have one camera that isn't working properly, and one that isn't working at all. While I was calling Troy to tell him what happened I was going over it in my head and it sounded like I just don't know how to use a camera, since 2 cameras had relatively the same issue, but nope. It wasn't me. He told me to bring the camera back to him, he'll refund my money and he'll send it off to get it fixed since it's still under warranty. 

I left him with the camera and went to have lunch with my friend Danielle at this great Ethiopian place called Red Sea in Charlotte. We went to walk in and noticed it didn't open til 4 (it was currently 1 something). The owner saw us and came and let us in and cooked for us. He opened exclusively for us almost 3 hours ahead of time. The nicest guy and the food was great. (Again, go to the Red Sea in Charlotte!) While we were eating, Troy texted me and told me he had a loaner camera for me until then, so after lunch I went back by the studio to pick it up. I met an interesting guy that there is the camera man for a Discovery Channel show and learned a few things about the business just because I'm inquisitive with everyone I meet. Hey, I like knowing about people/things! 

Last night I had my going away party here in Greensboro. I had dinners and drinks with some really good people and I'm glad I got to see them before I left. Some of them were surprises. Others that didn't show up, well, I don't hold it against them. Things happen. I'll see them again in this life or the next. I'm just glad I do have some friends that are willing to see me off before I start this next chapter of my life. I mean I could just be on the road for a month and decide to come back home. Who knows? This is exactly what the trip and experience started out being about. 

Also, at the urge of a few friends, they convinced me to start a Go Fund Me page for anyone interested in supporting me on this venture as I won't be working on the road and completely coming out of pocket. I've created a few incentives for anyone interested, so that way I'm not just taking your money. I don't want you to think I'm begging, I'm just asking if you want to help. That's all. Please read the page and find out more about the idea. Thanks for reading!

Click Here For Go Fund Me!

Bad news

Someone once told me "Its not an adventure until something goes wrong." Well something went wrong.

My camera started acting up 2 days ago during a boudoir shoot with a bride I'm doing a wedding for. I thought it might've been in my settings but I realized today my shutter might be dying. Its an older body so it makes sense, but very bad timing! I leave in 7 days, what do I do?

Do I send it to Canon to get it fixed? I haven't been quoted a price yet but I know it'd take a minimum of a week and a half. I'll be up north by then, no one local can fix it. I've listed it for sale and hopefully someone is going to get it. It doesn't need an immediate fix but itll need something at some point soon and I can't afford that time.

Now: what do I do about a camera in the mean time? In my asking of friends about places to fix this, someone mentioned having a camera they can sell me. They're in Charlotte and fortunately I'll be there Saturday because I have a photo shoot there that day. Very fortunate. He absolutely helped me out although I wasn't expecting this expense. This sets me back a little bit for expenses on my road trips because as of now I won't be working on the road. So my money will dwindle fairly quickly.

So because of those thoughts, I've been thinking about what is after my trips ? When do I stop? Do I have an exit strategy? And where do I want to be? How do I expect to make money once the little bit I have saved runs out?

All of those thoughts run in and out of my mind. I won't let it stop me. Too many people are dying now a days and I don't want to die knowing I just sat around and did nothing. That I didn't explore this world, that I didn't meet as many people as possible and laugh as often as I could. I can't let that happen. I'm not saying if you don't live like this you're wrong, but I don't envy the 9-5. I envy the consistent money and I love the idea of stability but once I get a taste of it I become claustrophobic.

I hope my trip is more fruitful than its starting out to be, I don't want to be bitter before it begins. I want to be as optimistic as a kid and see things happen that are completely out of my comfort zone.

I won't let today beat me up.

The man Boone

This is the guy in Boone I bought the necklace off of. He doesn't consider himself homeless, just a traveler. Someone looking to explore without the restraints that society puts on people. He doesn't come from money, and he isn't a beggar by trade, so instead he makes necklaces out of hemp and jewels and makes some pretty cool designs and sells them so people feel like theyre getting something out of them.

He's originally from Colorado, and has his massage therapy license. That's what his trade is, but that's not what defines him. He told me of some places to visit, where I can 'fly [my] flag' (put up signs asking for help) and where I can't, he told me of his ups and downs and where he's been. I asked him where he's going next, and he doesn't know, he's just gonna go when and where it presents itself.

I asked him what his most expensive piece was, and I thought it was going to be the one with the biggest piece in it, but I was wrong. He showed me the one that was $20 (and that he would really prefer to only take $20 for it, as opposed to the others he'd haggle on - who haggles with someone needing money?) and so I bought that piece off of him. It's going to be my reminder that I can do it too, if necessary. I can make these travels work for me. I'm going out on the road with a few dollars in my pocket, and that if he can do it - so can I. I'm going to wear this as much as possible (it's hemp so really I could really wear it all the time - even in the shower).

I hope my trips inspire other people, like this guy inspired me. Laugh or question me if you want, but it's ok. This is my adventure. You live how you have to.

Pictures from Boone

Here are a few pictures from Boone that I've taken awhile to post. What a beautiful town and wonderful experience. I have a few more pictures to post from there but these are the ones I've looked through so far. In less than 2 weeks I leave for the north east and although I didn't see myself going that way at first, I'm very excited!

The 'Why'

A lot of people keep asking me the same question over and over: Why? Its a pretty simple question and I should be able to answer it but for the longest time I couldn't. I just said 'Why not?', and although that's a perfectly acceptable reason in my mind I felt compelled to really figure out why.

For the longest time I've had this feeling inside of me, this yearning to just go somewhere. To meet these people I haven't met before and see these things I haven't even thought of yet. I'm scared, yes, definitely but that's good. I don't want the mundane/boring or anything resembling what every day life tends to be for most people.  Day in and day out, rinse lather and repeat.

My best friend said he couldn't do this. He said he'd be afraid he'd be killed, and he's a much larger and scarier looking guy than me. Irrational fear? I don't know. That's his fear, who am I to call it irrational? Hell, I'm terrified of butterflies so I can't say anything. The point is, why be afraid of what you can't control? Or even if you can, why worry? I would rather die by someone out on the road than of heart disease from eating one too many Cook Out treys in front of the TV. At least my life would be something to talk about.

I'm lying here in bed as I write this. Music playing and windows open so I have the sound of beautiful music and the sound of nature going on right outside my window and all I can think of is how much I want to be on the road right now. Its not that simple. I don't necessarily want to be on the road, I want to be meeting people but I can't do that at 3am just anywhere. Maybe NYC but certainly not just anywhere.  Actually in most places I can't.

I've got 4 boxes packed. Just 4. And I have less than 2 weeks left in my house. I'm such a procrastinator. I will be dropping my stuff at my best friends' in Winston-Salem and then almost immediately hitting the road for the north east. When I get back I'll he hitting the road almost immediately (again) and going to Virginia &  West Virginia to explore some mountains and the mountain folk. Maybe meet some Uncle Dads or Aunt Moms. Or are those Mormons? I kid, I kid. I think I just offended a lot of people with that one. My apologies.

With that said, I'm going to try and sleep. I have a bridal shoot in the afternoon I need to get prepped for. I hope I didn't drink coffee too late last night....

Boone, NC

At 530 this morning I had just got back from watching the moon over Boone out on a cliff in the middle of the blue ridge parkway with nobody around but a nice breeze.

I stayed up there for about 2 hours with my friend Emillee as she showed me the beautiful landscape. We talked about everything and nothing. We heard noises, we made confessions, we laughed, one of us cried, and I took a few pictures.  It was a surreal experience.

This is essentially the first (unofficial) stop on my road trip. Although I haven't began to move, this is my 2nd day here and I'm loving it. I leave in 2 weeks , and I just got a call from my friend Greg Haskell (great tattoo artist) and said he wanted to link up with me on the road. So, if everything works out, I'll be joining him on his trip up North East, up the east coast. 

He told me him and his partner have something to do up north and asked if I wanted to join.  So we're going to meet up around the West Virginia area and me and my dog will be joining them and hitting the road. Lots and lots of pictures, laughs, and memories going down on this trip.

Today I met and got to talking to a homeless man selling necklaces instead of asking for money. I bought his most expensive piece (only $20) just so he could definitely have money for the day. 

He allowed me to take his professional portrait for my project and we talked for half an hour about how to travel and where to travel. Inspiration is everywhere, if you just step outside of your comfort zone. 

I'm grateful today.

Friends

Since I've announced my departure from the state (NC) many friends (those I haven't seen in a while and some I haven't met, online only) have been wanting to hangout. More and more of them. Its kind of a weird feeling. On one hand I really appreciate any time someone wants to hangout with me, because if you think about it its a pretty remarkable thing. Someone wants to put themselves into your life for a brief period of time just for a few moments in order to create (hopefully) memories.

Unfortunately I have less and less time to do so because there's a lot to do. I'm still trying to get work in order to save as much as I can, I still have to finish work that I owe, I still have work lined up to prepare for, I have to pack and make arrangements, I have to see family and then I have to see the friends that I can. I really wish I could see and spend time with everyone but i know its impossible. And a lot of them want me to come to them and unfortunately its just not financially possible. That money will be going to spending time on the road, and its probably not something they can understand but its the truth.

There have been some people I've been able to make time for and I'm grateful for being able to. One of them is someone I haven't actually hung out with too many times but we get along great and admire each others work. I'd venture to say I'm definitely more of a fan of his than him of mine, but I'm OK with that. His name is Jeff Howlett and some of you reading may know him, but for those that don't you should Google him. Or allow me to brag on him on him in his absence. He directed and produced a beautiful and inspiring documentary that you can currently find on Netflix called A Band Called Death. Now I'm not defining him by this one film, but its very popular and great reviews.

He's an amazingly nice guy. Down to earth, humble, generous. He invited me to Rock Hill, SC where he lives to do an old school wet plate portrait of me. When I came down, we (him and his gf and myself) went out to dinner, and on top of that gave me a few pieces of photography equipment to take on the road. Regardless of the cost to him or of what he gave me, he still gave it. He also extended an invitation to crash at his house whenever I'm passing through town.  See? Generous.

This from a person I've only hung out with a few times. It doesn't matter the amount of time you are with someone , it matters the quality of time you are with someone. I don't just mean Jeff, I mean with anyone. Make time count, dont take it for granted. Make friends with everyone and never ignore an invitation for conversation. Get to know the next person that stands next to you waiting for the bus, or someone outside smoking a cigarette, or the server at the restaurant you're at. They could be the most interesting person you know. Or they could be total shit heads, but you never know until you say hello.

This post is dedicated to Jeff Howlett. Thanks for being a friend, and for being so gracious. I do appreciate it amigo.

Salut!

2 1/2 Weeks

I leave at the end of the month. It sounds like a decent amount of time but half the month is over, and I'm left with just 18 days.

That's 18 days to see the friends I've accumulated in North Carolina in the last 7-8 years. How does one do that?  Quickly, I suppose, and in between that time I have to still try and get as much work as possible to save more money up because I won't be working on the road (maybe I'll find some, I'm hopeful), I have to edit remaining sessions that I've already done (and will do), and I have to pack. Fortunately I'm not a fan of collecting things and what I need to store I can put in my friends houses for awhile and the rest I'm putting in my car and hitting the road.

People keep asking me if I'm scared or excited. Yes. My emotions are running a gambit. Why wouldn't they? I'm taking a 15 year old car with 200,000 miles that I've had what seems like forever, and hitting the road with no destination with just me and my dog and I have no idea where I'm going or what I'm looking for. I want to meet people.  I want to get to know a little bit of everyone I meet on the road, and off the road too. I want to stay with strangers. I want to try foods I've never tried. I want to meet their family. I want to do things I've never done before. I want to laugh in ways I've never laughed. I want people that have never met me to call me a friend after I leave. I want so many things.

I've decided to continue what I started last year. I started a thing called The Happiness Project and it was a brief interjection of myself into random peoples lives and how they lived and where they lived and what made them happy. I made the mistake last year of doing video work with it, and I'm not a video guy. I don't know a lot about how to light, compose, shoot and edit video. I'm a photographer, and I know how to do that. So I'm going to take pictures of people in America and learn a little bit about them along the way.

I have 18 days, and I'm so anxious but this is my journey and its coming...